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Time is generally the best doctor.
My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more.
When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays.
The great secret of doctors, known only to their wives, but still hidden from the public, is that most things get better by themselves most things, in fact, are better in the morning.
Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it.
I was always shocked when I went to the doctor's office and they did my X-ray and did not find that I had eight more ribs than I should have or that my blood was the color green.
In the name of Hypocrites, doctors have invented the most exquisite form of torture ever known to man: survival.
The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing.
I am 86 and my doctor used to tell me to slow down - at least he did until he dropped dead.
Some people think that doctors and nurses can put scrambled eggs back in the shell.
You can die of the cure before you die of the illness.
People are so afraid of authority figures and doctors are authority figures.
The physician's highest calling, his only calling, is to make sick people healthy - to heal, as it is termed.
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing.
Growing up, my dolls were doctors and on secret missions. I had Barbie Goes Rambo.
When a man goes through six years training to be a doctor he will never be the same. He knows too much.
Flying back from New York, the flight attendant said God, I wished you were here yesterday, we had a stroke on the plane. I said, if I have a stroke on a plane, I hope the pretend doctor is not the one on the plane. I want a real doctor.
America has the best doctors, the best nurses, the best hospitals, the best medical technology, the best medical breakthrough medicines in the world. There is absolutely no reason we should not have in this country the best health care in the world.
I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?
I am strongly for a patient Bill of Rights. Decisions ought to be made by doctors, not accountants.