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On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.

Now, let me be clear. The path I lay out is not one paved with ever increasing government checks and cradle to grave assurance that government will always be the solution. If this election is a bidding war for who can promise the most goodies and the most benefits, I am not your president. You have that president today.

Government is an association of men who do violence to the rest of us.

There are many people who feel that it is useless and futile to continue talking about peace and non-violence against a government whose only reply is savage attacks on an unarmed and defenceless people.

Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that do not get wet you can keep.

Many people want the government to protect the consumer. A much more urgent problem is to protect the consumer from the government.

There is danger from all men. The only maxim of a free government ought to be to trust no man living with power to endanger the public liberty.

I spent my whole life in the private sector, 25 years in the private sector. I understand that when government takes more money out of the hands of people, it makes it more difficult for them to buy things. If they can not buy things, the economy Does not grow. If the economy Does not grow, we do not put Americans to work.

It is easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.

It is a good thing we do not get all the government we pay for.

The Great Depression, like most other periods of severe unemployment, was produced by government mismanagement rather than by any inherent instability of the private economy.

The greatest advances of civilization, whether in architecture or painting, in science and literature, in industry or agriculture, have never come from centralized government.

There is only one kind of freedom and that is individual liberty. Our lives come from our creator and our liberty comes from our creator. It has nothing to do with government granting it.

The only sure bulwark of continuing liberty is a government strong enough to protect the interests of the people, and a people strong enough and well enough informed to maintain its sovereign control over the goverment.

I am sometimes a fox and sometimes a lion. The whole secret of government lies in knowing when to be the one or the other.

I was ecstatic they re-named French Fries as Freedom Fries. Grown men and women in positions of power in the U.S. government showing themselves as idiots.

When one gets in bed with government, one must expect the diseases it spreads.

I am absolutely opposed to a national ID card. This is a total contradiction of what a free society is all about. The purpose of government is to protect the secrecy and the privacy of all individuals, not the secrecy of government. We do not need a national ID card.

There is no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.